Texting
by haveyounomercy
Summary: Shinji got into an argment with Ryoma, so he asks his best friend Kamio for advice... through text messages. ShinjixRyoma, one-shot, mildly cracky.


**A/N A prompt from the lovely awin-chan, which said "ShinjixRyoma, cell phone text messaging." So here it is. **

**Fact: Kamio says "Echizen" because he doesn't know him that well while Shinji calls him "Ryoma".**

**Bonus Fact: Each of Shinji's text messages are 437 characters, including spaces C=**

* * *

"Sha Sha Sha… Rhythm!" Kamio jumped from the sudden noise coming from his cell phone. Setting aside his homework, he picked up his cell phone and flipped it open.

-Message received May 4th 2009, 4:31 pm from Shinji Ibu-

_Kamio, I'm so confused right now, because Ryoma asked me out on a date the other day but he wouldn't__ tell me where; and today he asked me if I had bought a tuxedo yet. When I asked him why, he got all mad that I had forgotten about the date and stomped off. But I really didn't forget, it's him that didn't tell me that I had to bring a tuxedo, so it's actually all his fault. Now he won't respond to my texts or answer my calls or anyth_

-Message is too long, message has been cut off-

Kamio sighed. This wasn't the first time Shinji had complained to him about his bratty boyfriend, but it was much easier when they were texting. He still hadn't written the thank-you letter he had planned to the phone company for having a letter capacity.

_Shinji, __why are you telling me this? By the way, your message was cut off… again._

-Message Sent-

Kamio leaned back and started working on his homework again. He knew it would be a while before Shinji replied. After all, you would have to have lightning-fingers to write as much as Shinji did in the average person's response time.

-Message received May 4th, 2009, 4:52 pm from Shinji Ibu-

_Kamio, I really think you should change your phone system. It's always cutting off my messages, and never bothering to ask me if I want to be cut off. How rude. Come to think of it, it's just like Ryoma. Does your phone also get angry at you if you don't wear a tuxedo? That would suck. So, do you know any good tuxedo stores? All the ones I know are too expensive, and I just spent a lot of money on grip tape, because I didn't know tha_

-Message is too long, message has been cut off-

Kamio wondered why he had ever given Shinji his cell phone number.

_Shinji, why don't you try and apologize to Ryoma? If that doesn't work, just ask your mom for money and buy some flowers and a tux or something._

-Message has been sent-

Sometimes Kamio just wanted to ignore Shinji's texts, but that would only result in getting a long, rambly call from Shinji that couldn't be cut off.

-Message received May 4th 2009, 5:17 pm from Shinji Ibu-

_Don't you think that I've tried to apologize already? Don't take for an idiot, Kamio. Earlier I actually tried to go to Ryoma's house to say sorry, but his father had said that he was out eating burgers with Momoshiro. Can you believe that? Not only is that damn fat burger-eating jerk a bike-thief, but he's also a boyfriend stealer. I was so mad I didn't try to call Ryoma for a whole two hours. Not that he noticed, or anything. Damn _

-Message is too long, message has been cut off-

Kamio clenched his phone in frustration. This was getting annoying. He had to pull out his last trick.

_Sorry Shinji, I have to go. __Buy some nice flowers and make up with Echizen, okay? Bye-bye._

-Message has been sent-

There. Now he was safe.

* * *

"Stupid Kamio. He probably only used that as an excuse to blow me off. He always does that after we text for a few minutes. It's always the same, I'm never appreciated. Not even my boyfriend will talk to me now. Who can I talk to? I'm alone in the world. I heard a song about that once I think. It was such a crappy song, though. It was so depressing and it just went on and on like a rambling mess. I hate it when people ramble. Why can't they just go straight to the point like I do? Without all those fancy words, just straight forward. That would be the best, I think. I guess that's why I like Ryoma so much. He's just like me, no rambling, just to the point. In a way, we're really similar…" As Shinji mumbled on, his fingers had been unconsciously moving on his phone. He looked down at his cell phone.

It was from a few days ago, the starter of all the trauma.

-Message received May 1st 2009, 3:14 pm from Echizen Ryoma-

_Hey boyfriend. Let's go on a date on Monday._

Yup, that was just like his boyfriend. Short and not very sweet. Shinji suddenly noticed that there had been more to the message. With a slightly dreaded feeling, he scrolled down.

_P.S. It's my cousin's wedding, so bring a tux._

And for once, Shinji Ibu was speechless.

* * *

"And why are you here?" Ryoma stared up at the long-haired boy in tuxedo holding flowers outside of his house.

"I'm sorry Ryoma. But it's really actually your fault-" Shinji stopped himself. "I'm sorry." He repeated.

"Mada Mada Dane, boyfriend." Ryoma smirked, and took out his cell phone. After pushing a few buttons, he showed the screen to Shinji.

_P.P.S. It's on the 11__th__, a week from next Monday._

* * *

**Omake**

"Shinji… What are you doing?" Kamio was least to say confused when he saw a rather grumpy looking Shinji on his doorstep, dressed in a tuxedo with a bouquet of flowers.

"Your advice sucks, Kamio. I went to Ryoma's house today because like you said, but when I got there..."

Kamio's insides dropped despairingly. It was going to be a long night.


End file.
